I had to get a crown put on this afternoon, so DH watched Madi for a couple of hours. I even ran to the store afterwards ALONE for the first time in weeks! Even though I was at the dentist, it was nice to have a break. I need to make more time for myself. I am starting to realize how important it is to take little breaks from being with Madi and have some "me" time every now and again. It is getting a little easier for me to leave her with DH for a couple of hours at a time.
We are still nursing, so she usually gets pretty frantic for me if I'm away too long from her. I chose from the beginning not to pump and use bottles, so I am her primary source of milk and comfort.
Madi has never taken a pacifier either, so when she starts having a meltdown because she needs or wants me and I am not around, it is impossible for anyone but me to calm her. DH can attest to this. On several occasions, I have come home to a screaming, sobbing baby. And it has broken my heart:( I think that is why I am so hesitant to leave her...plus when I do, I just think about her constantly and end up feeling guilty for not being there for her should she need or want me. I know, I know. Major separation issues...I admit it, unashamed!
One of these days I will 'allow' one of our parents (who are very eager) to watch her so DH and I can have a date night...the time will come. I am in no hurry and neither is DH to leave her. We love having Madi with us ALL the time and we have had many years of dating and many more in the future. I think right now we are still so in love with being parents and never want to be apart from our lovey!
Ok...I have rambled on enough. I am so long-winded sometimes!
I am Thankful for...
*Sunrises. I have seen some really awesome sunrises in some really awesome places. Over the ocean on a boat, on a mountain, at the beach, in foreign lands, in the desert, during a snowstorm, during a beautiful rainstorm, from a hotel rooftop, from my rooftop, on my honeymoon...just to name a few! All memorable and beautiful.
*Sunsets. Romantic and peaceful way to say goodbye to the day.
*Patience. Some days it takes every ounce of patience to stay calm with a screaming, teething baby who just needs to be held and loved!
*My education. My parents spared no expense when it came to my and my older brother's education. we went to private schools growing up and were afforded the opportunities to attend four-year colleges.
*My religion and spirituality. Without my beliefs and acknowledgment of God, I would be lost in life.
*My cell phone. I didn't realize how secure it made me feel and how much I depend on it until I was without it for 6 months.
*Co-sleeping with my daughter. We brought Madi into our bed to sleep with us when she was 1 week old and she has slept in the crook of my arm ever since.
Dear Madison,
~You love boxes! You like to pull up on them, climb in them and on them.
~Today,for the first time, you ate an entire jar of baby apples! Good girl!
~You are becoming quite the good eater and are so curious about foods. You like to watch us eat and know how to use a spoon (sort of). You will try grab at our food put it in your mouth, but you can't eat big people foods yet...someday:)
~You are SO ticklish especially under your arms and on your belly.
~You grab your feet and put them in your mouth and laugh because you tickle yourself:)LOL
~You LOVE, LOVE, LOVE when I jump around the room and make monkey sounds.
~You laugh so hard when I do aerobics or jump up and down or dance for you.
~You love to be bounced up and down.
~You love all music...the louder the better!
~You have no interest in television...yet. Let's keep it that way:)
~You are even more beautiful than yesterday and keep getting more gorgeous everyday.
~You have an infectious smile and laugh.
~You can pull yourself into a sitting position all by yourself.
~When music is playing bounce or rock tot he beat.
I LOVE the look on her face...so mischievous!
Madi loves her dentist, Grandpa Doug.
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